Here's how it's gone so far:
1. Fist of Legend. Jet Li snaps a dude's leg in half five minutes in. It gets better from there.
2. The Protector. Tony Jaa's follow up to Ong-Bak. Honestly, it was not quite as good as I remember it being. The one-shot fight scene up four floors is still impressive as all hell, but I can't help but feel that Tony Jaa's style is too fanciful. It's flair for the sake of flair, and lacks the ruthless precision and efficiency exhibited by Jet Li in Fist of Legend.
Still. HE KICKS A GUY OUT OF A HELICOPTER. That can't be overstated. See this movie.
3. Surrogates. Remember that Bruce Willis sci-fi actioner that came out last summer? Neither does anybody else.
The concept is interesting enough; in the future, everyone lives their lives through robotic avatars, a technology developed by the same guy who invented robots in I, Robot.
Hehe. Creepy. But seriously, holla at James Cromwell. Dude's a boss.
Unfortunately, the movie isn't that great. And by "not that great" I mean pretty bad. There're a lot of cool touches; I really like how artificial all the surrogates' skin looks, and Bruce Willis with hair is always a trip. It's almost worth watching the movie for.
4. District B 13. I had completely forgotten how awesome this movie was. Despite it's RIDICULOUS premise (some hoods in a warded off district of Paris accidentally come across a nuke and decide to use it) it has some incredible action sequences, and is pretty competently made. Pierre Morel is no slouch. (See: Taken)
As it was produced and co-written by Luc Besson, it contains many of his signature touches: a plot designed for maximum action, scenes of underworld life, and, most pressingly, a prepubescent-looking female lead who is actually in her mid twenties.
But before we go into full-on Luc Besson roast mode, let's concentrate on what works here: The action.
The film was lauded for it's highlighting of parkour, but it actually doesn't contain as much parkour as you might expect from a film lauded for its highlighting of parkour. However, the shootout/fight scene in the casino is mesmerizing. I watched it several times. Now you too! You watch! You watch!
Cool, right? I love the part where he jumps onto the table and shoots the guy behind him. Also, the part where he judo flips the dude off the balcony onto the table. Also, the part where he flies across half the room and kicks the guy. Also, ... well yeah. Watch it.
5. Die Hard 2: Die Harder. One of the more eloquently named films in the past quarter-century, Die Harder (German for "The Harder") gets kind of a bad rap. The first Die Hard is considered one of the greatest action movies ever made, the third one has Sam Jackson in it (AND he's named Zeus. That's a big money combination right there) and the fourth one, well the fourth one is the one where John McClane fights a plane. On foot.
But no one ever talks about the second one. It's got so much great stuff going for it! Dennis Franz as Dennis Franz, that part where the villains have two different types of ammo clips (blue for blanks, red for dead - just thought of that one, no autographs please), and slingblade as the janitor! It's awesome!
So awesome they couldn't show the genuine article on the tele!
6. Hard Boiled. Nothing more need be said. This is the greatest action movie of all time. The action is stunningly elegant while fist-pumpingly visceral. The dialogue and drama are of the finest variety cheese. I just showed this movie to two friends who had never seen it. They whooped and cheered throughout. Fist pumping happened. See Hard Boiled. Nowzorz.
I want this trailer narration on a loop in my head at all times.
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